If the dog is quiet, be afraid.

So this weekend I did a base change to help out a fellow medic and instead of my 0630-1830 shift I'm working 1030-2230. No big deal. This morning I was sleeping at around 8am and I thought I heard my cell phone turn on. I assumed this was me dreaming because I was sleeping and Jaci was at work. And on the off chance that a burglar broke in, I'm sure of two things. One, he wouldn't care about the phone and two, I have a hulking German Shepherd to serve and protect. As the dog was finally quiet (she whines at the cats), I paid the imaginary noise no mind. As soon as I thought about the dog being quiet I should have leapt from the bed faster than a greased pig headed for the chow. But I didn't. Because I'm naive, and not yet fully understanding of the dog mentality.

So when I do rise at 9 o'clock I go to the kitchen and see my cell phone case on the floor. With a fresh set of Chewie's dental work in it. This does not overly upset me because the case is still usable and the pot marks add character and an amusing anecdote. Then I see the phone. Lying still and lifeless on the living room floor, powered on and marked all over with teethmarks and drool stains is now merely the inanimate object that was once my cell phone.

It's gone. It still has the ability to receive calls (the vibrate functions no more), and send calls IF I remember the phone number and IF I punch it in right. The screen which was once graced by Angelina Jolie (she's on my list, ask Jaci) is nothing but odd streaks of distortion. And everybody from Jaci, to my partner, nurses, doctors and anyone within earshot thinks this is funny. Maybe it will be one day. One day far from this day.

As I was looking at it in shock and horror I turn to the dog who is looking at me as if to say.....nothing; because she then closed her eyes as if to sleep. Ah to sleep, perchance to dream of her next victim. I saw her eyeing my XBox tonight and I think I detected some drool so tomorrow she and I will watch "Old Yeller" so that I can make my point clear if she goes near it.

Monday I go shopping for a new phone.